3rd-party Hook-up No.1 – Once Beaten, Twice Sharp!

  

My friends were beginning to get worried about my newly acquired reclusive personality. No boyfriend, nothing… from home to the office and back home. On weekends, I stayed indoors sleeping the hours away. My life became soo boring, chai, no be small! My friends concluded that I needed an “intervention” ASAP. So this time around, Ola came to the rescue. One of his brother’s friends had been disturbing him to hook him up with a babe; he thought I would be a good match for the guy, so he staged the hookup. Make e no be like say... I shaa obliged to at least meet the bros.

His Stats

Before we met, and although I couldn’t really be bothered, I had to ask Ola for simple details just to form interested. Ola described him as light in complexion (erm….not my type I like me some brown sugar), of average height, outgoing, cool and a consultant. I didn’t bother to ask further questions about his personality and why he couldn’t find a girlfriend by himself.

The Connection

Since I was not interested and was just doing it to get my friends off my back for a while, I of course, didn’t want to add the dude to my Blackberry Messenger. So I told Ola he could give him only my mobile number. He called three days after Ola gave him my number and he sounded cool on the phone and very eager for us to meet. And yeah, he did try to form 'pho-neh English' for me but I ignored that bit. I don't buy into guys that 'form' abeg; I no be learner naa.

The First Date

We finally hooked up after work on a Friday to watch Columbiana at the Silverbird Galleria. It was a fantastic movie (no free advert though) but we didn’t get to talk much during the movie. After the movie, we decided to have a late dinner at Barcelos and we spent most of the time talking about the movie, undergrad days and about ourselves. He talked so much about himself, his car, trips abroad etc. and in my mind, I was like “okayyyyy...!!”. Well, I got a little bored after a while and we finally decided to leave. He offered to drop me at home but I rejected and took a cab instead. For all its worth he did put me in a cab and paid for it (e try small).

....

Although the first date wasn’t bad, I was just too busy at work to accept his subsequent date invitations but he kept in touch via phone calls (most of which I often ignored). After about four invitation denials, I accepted to go with him for his friend’s get-together. Thank God I did, 'cos that was where God actually saved me from unnecessary trouble.

The END

You know for some funny reason I was actually looking forward to the party (I guess Baba God just wanted to open his yansh, pardon my French); I even called my friends to come help me pick out what to wear (please don’t rub it in). He picked me up at home and didn’t stop gloating and complimenting me. I was taking it all in and I enjoyed the attention, to be honest.

The party was at a lounge and the setting was cool; lots to eat and drink, DJ blasting cool jams. He introduced me to his friends and sat me down while he gisted with some of them. While seated, I saw my brother’s friend walking towards me. So I stood up to say hello but he pulled me by the hand and dragged me outside. I was confused so I asked what the problem was. He was furious... To cut the long story short, this bobo was engaged to a babe based in UK! My brother's friend knew the guy and his fiancée very very well.

I became weak!

I managed to keep cool but not for long. I called Ola immediately and in between fury and disappointment; I managed to give him the gist. Ola promised to call his brother and get back to me. The five minutes it took for Ola to call me back felt like an hour. (Meanwhile, “loverboy player” was inside looking for his trophy given to him on a platter of gold). Ola confirmed it; loverboy was indeed engaged; what insolence I thought. Ah well! Thank God I found out this early.

And guess what I did next? I went back inside the lounge, picked up a drink from the waiter and as loverboy was coming towards me; with a smirk on my face; I poured the drink on his head, turned around and left him dripping of Cosmopolitan. (Erm... I didn’t actually do that but I wish I had lol). What I did though was to take a cab home and never picked his call again. I did respond once to his numerous text messages with this “I hope your fiancée realizes soon enough that she’s engaged to a lying smelling pig”; and with that he never called or texted me again.

Lesson Learnt:

*Couple picture source: www.madamenoire.com